top of page


Michael:  Greetings.this is Michael I would like to booked you for my family celebration party and do you accept all means of payment. Kindly text me on my direct number for more details thanks.


Scot:  For reservations, please call **********


Michael:  Thank you for your response let me know the availability dates you have between 29th or 30th for 80 people food and drink to pickup are you the owner?


Scot:  We never have dates available for 80 people.  Yes, I am the owner.


Michael:  Okay good can you send me your menu pricing 




Michael:  Crock of chili, caprese flatbread,tomato basil bisque,caesar salad,sliders 


I want you to put something together for me here my budget is $15/25 per person for 80 people food also appreciate if you can send me your cell phone number to text you better communication thank you 


Scot:  Please submit an original handwritten order and a copy for each of the 80 people who are expected to dine on a sheet of 8.5 X 11 lined notebook paper and mail it to The Flaming Buoy Filet Co. Dept. of Paranormal Investigation. Please include a self-addressed, stamped envelope.  We must receive the letters by 9:00 tonight.  No exceptions – except for the one exception, the nature of which I will not disclose.


We will investigate your haunting, but ask that neither the media nor screen actress Gwyneth Paltrow be involved.  I will contact the media, contacting Gwyneth Paltrow will be your task.  I would contact her myself but we had a falling out when I toid her I thought her best role was as a head in a box at the end of the movie “Se7en.”


You do not need my cell phone number.  At least one of us communicating well enough for both of us.




JUNE 2021

bottom of page